Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Laundry talk 3 Final

Girl 1: Amber (Maddy)
Girl 2: Becca (Carolina)
Girl 3: Kylie (Amanda)
Gay Guy: Steven (Johnny)

Becca: Good evening everyone and welcome to tonight’s laundry talk. My fellow co-hosts and I are coming to you from Mckean’s laundry room on the first floor as we do our weekly load of 5 bags of laundry each. The hottest girls from Rollins are bringing you the hottest stories from around the world.

Amber: Our first story comes from the coasts of California were each week an average of six sea otters wash up dead on the shore.

Kylie: Aren’t sea otters like puppies that can swim.

Becca: Actually they are! The problem is scientists do not know what's killing the sea otters. Usually cause the of death is clear with a shark bite, a bullet, or a propeller wound. But about one-quarter of last year's fatalities have been traced to a pair of protozoan parasites, Toxoplasma gondii and Sarcocystis neurona, that are known to breed in cats.

Kylie: So cats are killing sea otters?

Becca: Well not totally! The problem is that people are flushing kitty litter down their toilets. Worms dropped into the ocean by seabirds and a toxic ingredient in fertilizer are also known to be killing the cute little otters.

Kylie: Like How about we put big nets in the ocean to catch them all and save them?

Steven: Are you serious like that will just get them tangled in the nets and kill even more of them.

Kylie: But if we catch them all we can dress them up in cute outfits and adopt them as pets!

Steven: No that’s just stupid!

Becca: But it is totally okay! Because the Great Governor of Califorinia, Arnold Schwarzenegger has just raised the fine for harming a sea otter to $25,000 and he requires that all kitty litter sold in California has to carry a warning label so that owners now know that there kitties are killing our dear little sea otters.

Steven: O Arniie! He use to turn me on in his terminator days.

Amber: At the age of 59 Arnold stil turns me on! He is so cute with his perfectly pressed governor suites…I love role playing.

Kylie: Arnold went to University of Wisconsin-Superior, where he graduated with degrees in international marketing of fitness and business administration.

Becca: Thanks Kylie…that brings us to our next topic.

Amber: Yeah… did ya know that the countries fortune 50 CEO’s did not all do their undergraduates at Ivy league schools…in fact the University of Texas has just as much representation as Harvard with three CEO’s.

Steven: So that means I can be the CEO of Macy’s?

Amber: Yes, Steven now we all have hope to be the glorious and famous girls that we all strive to be!

Kylie: One day I will be the CEO of Animal planet and all the animals will be dressed in cute outfits from Steven’s newly acquired Macy’s

Steven: Thank you Kylie… Well that is all we have for you for on tonight’s laundry talk it is now time for our late night facials as we rock out to the Queen of Hollywood

ALL: (scream) Lindsay Lohan!

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